11/07/2007

TIPS FOR SUSTAINABLE LIVING

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The halloween costume poll has closed. As I suspected, it appears that by far the sexiest thing a man can be is Unavailable. "Sensitive Guy" is a close second. Contrary to common thought, "Rich Guy" came in dead last with only 1 vote, trailing behind "Giant Penis". It looks like the ladies and homosexuals of our readership almost have their priorities right.

I'm at a Starbucks right now supervising a visit, and I'm looking at a "Climate Action NOW" (CAN) poster, which is saying to "reduce carbon", and then offering a series of icons explaining how to do this. Regarding your habits at home, it instructs you to "Keep it Cool" (KIC)


55 degrees? Really? I guess I'm going to need to start wearing warmer clothes while lounging around the house. Nothing says "relaxing Sunday morning" like a warm cup of coffee enjoyed through the sight-hole of a fur lined tundra coat.
The other suggestions are car-related. First is "Inflate Tires" (IT)


With inflated tires, not only will you get better gas mileage, you'll also avoid those annoying showers of sparks from the bare wheel rims grinding on the pavement. Good advice I guess but I mean…Isn't this kind of a no-brainer?

Next is "Don't Idle" (DI)


This may be confusing at first as one wonders, how can I keep from idling? Won't I have to idle any time I come to a stoplight or get stuck in traffic? I think the suggestion here is that if those situations arise, you should not stop at all. That's right, just keep right on driving at posted speed limits. With luck, you will be able to push the other cars out of the way and keep driving at maximum fuel efficiency. But if not, you will most likely just get in a horrific auto crash, destroying your smog-belching vehicle (good) or killing yourself. (best)

The final suggestion is "Plan Your Trip" (PYT)


As best I can interpret the icon, the idea is, with your destination in mind you leave your house on a bike. At some point you abandon your bike and continue on foot. Halfway there, hijack a car and drive the next 1/4 of the trip. At the three quarter mark, find a bus, load your car onto the bus's "car rack", and continue the rest of the way by bus. This is called "Planning Your Trip", (PYT) and it is just one of the many ways you can Care About Our Planet (CAOP) or whatever. (CAOPOW)

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