When I moved into my apartment I took over the lease from my aunt, who left a lot of her old junk here when she moved out. Today I was glancing through the kitchen cabinets and a cookbook caught my eye. The spine reads:
Barbara Kafka.... Was it Kafka's wife? Or was Barbara just Kafka's cookbook pseudonym, since Microwave Gourmet Cooking was not a socially acceptable activity for Austrian Jews in the early 1900's? Either way, I was intrigued, and began to peruse the recipes inside. A couple particularly yummy ones:
Colony Noodles with penal sauce
"Place all ingredients in cooking Apparatus, with harrow set to inscribe 'Be Delicious'. Let sit for 12 hours."
Cockroach Tenderloin with alienated potatoes and shame sauce
"Transform tenderloin in large mixing bowl. Microwave on High until dead."
Some of the other recipes looked pretty good too, but they were left unfinished.
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Labels: Strange experiences
Breaking news from Celebrity TV Show and Amusingly Gay Cultural Commentor and Internet Buzz Website and Insider Leak Blog and whatnot:
All the remaining copies of Warm Bodies are gone now, and as a result, I won't have to sell my bed yet. Wait that sounds like prostitution. I won't have to sell my couch. That's slightly better. Thanks guys. You keep my boat afloat.
Hey guys. So, yeah, I'm gonna have to sell my last 4 copies of WARM BODIES. I had planned to hold on to a few to use as loaners, but I am pretty hard-up right now, so I'm going to have to cash out. I know this sounds miserly but I'm going to have to actually sell these at a profitable price---20$ instead of the former at-production-cost 15$. What can I say, I gotta eat, preferably not people...but don't put it past me.